2007: A Look Back

The New Year celebration is my favorite time of year. I love the feeling of a fresh start and the excitement of reaching for new or resurrected goals. However, before moving on to 2008, I want to take inventory of the kind of year 2007 has been.

Looking back isn’t something you want to do too much of, but an honest look can reveal how much good we have enjoyed. Our tendency is either to view the past without recognizing the good things (“Nothing ever goes right for me”), or to glorify the past, as if things were always better in “the good ol’ days.” Neither of those extremes apply to real life.

I’ve tried to take a careful look at the past year and have settled on a few events that I want to highlight. The following awards are for the biggest personal events of 2007 (this will make the most sense to those of you who know Krista and me).

Most Poignant Award:
Our 1 Year Wedding Anniversary. I reveled in our celebration of one year of marriage. April 8 will always be a powerful icon of God’s redemption for me. I am married to my best friend and I love being with her.

The Improbable Award:
The Country Music Marathon. Crossing the finish line after 26.2 miles and 5 hours was an improbable dream for me before that moment. I don’t think I could have finished without Krista’s strong support and the support of my family and friends. The memory of finishing the marathon continues to be a source of encouragement in my pursuit of other goals.

Best Trip of 2007:
Napa Valley and Sonoma, CA with the LoCurtos. It was a magical week of relaxing, wine tasting, laughing, and learning. If we could go back with them tomorrow we would.

Mixed Blessing Award:
The Alexes Move to Estonia. Brian and Renee followed God’s lead to the country of Estonia to serve and pastor two churches in Kuressaare. We miss them greatly, but it has strengthened my faith more than I could measure as I’ve watched them receive God’s redemptive work in their marriage and then follow him into the unknown. (Click here if you would like to find out how to support their missionary work. Even a small amount can be a huge help!)

Curveball of the Year Award:
My sister Laura gets married in Las Vegas. The curveball here is not that Laura got married, but that she did so in Las Vegas! Another reminder that we Barmers don’t do status quo. We are very happy for her and are praying that she and Sean would experience God’s best for their new marriage.

Forging Friendships Award:
The Village Chapel. Whether it be the openness of our worship services, the comprehensive teaching of the Bible, our small group, or our new friends Aaron and Abigail Chen, we have much reason to be glad that God has led us to The Village Chapel.

Most Astounding Moment of 2007:
Krista shooting an MP5 submachine gun at our handgun class. “Is that my wife shooting that machine gun?” The answer was “yes,” but I had no way to classify what I was seeing. Watching Krista fire 10 rapid-fire shots into a helpless target could only be described with one word: astounding.

I may post my 2008 goals tomorrow, on New Year’s Day, but that would mean I’ll be held accountable by some of you, so I am hesitating.

Happy New Year!

Lavish Christmas

“We’ve become too polite. We don’t laugh and cry with God. We’ve forgotten the excitement of the Good News. What greater sign of the extraordinary, lavish, marvelous love of God than the incarnation! God so loved the world and all of us in it that God himself came to live with us as one of us! Is it so good that we’re afraid to believe it?”

– Madeleine L’Engle from Penguins and Golden Calves

May you celebrate the lavish gift that is Christ the Savior.

Merry Christmas to you and your family.

Christmas Crankiness

“It’s the most wonderful time of the year…”

In spite of the song sung every Christmas season about how wonderful Christmas is, I have mixed feelings. One one hand, I enjoy the nostalgic feelings that come along with all the decor, the food, and the music. It reminds me of the oblivious days of childhood, when every harsh reality could be easily kept at bay by playing in the dirt and pretending that I was one of the Dukes of Hazzard.

On the other hand, I am quickly annoyed by the forced cheerfulness that is sometimes a part of the holiday season. Earlier this week, I was quizzed as to why I wasn’t in a better mood. “It’s Christmas, after all!” It was topped off with a comment from one co-worker to another that Christmas “is a time when we are supposed to be cheerful.” This comment only further entrenched my Grinch-likeness.

What bothered me about that? Were they right? Should I put aside any feelings of angst, just for the sake of “holiday cheer?”

“Don’t Worry, Be Happy” is the mantra for these happily-going-lucky types, but there’s something there that doesn’t feel much like real life to me. We sometimes carry heavy burdens, regardless of how close we are to Christmas, and those burdens don’t go away just because we try real hard to get in the spirit.

Christmas is about one thing only: becoming receptive to a God who has come to us through the humble, messy trappings of humanity. We can be in an interactive, life-transforming relationship with God precisely because his invitation did not come with a requirement that we “cheer up” before we come to him.

So be a Scrooge at Christmas if that’s all you have to offer, but do so with the knowledge that Jesus welcomes you to friendship with God, whether you are the Grinch, Cousin Eddie, or the Happy Little Elf.

Stealing Christmas from the Rich

An acquaintance of mine recently made a decision to shift his whole way of looking at Christmas. He decided that it was foolish to spend $500 on trinkets, socks, and CDs as gifts for friends and family who needed no such things. Instead, he is taking the money he would have spent on these gifts and giving to Blood:Water Mission.

For each person on his Christmas list, he is giving a donation to B:WM in their name. He is informing each person–probably with a message in a Christmas card–that their name is on a gift that has been sent to another continent. This gift will help “to build clean wells in Africa, to support medical facilities caring for the sick, to make a lasting impact in the fight against poverty, injustice and oppression in Africa through the linking of needs, talents and continents, of people and resources” (from B:WM’s web site).

Great idea, huh? Apparently not. Some members of his family have, in Grinch-like spirit, expressed their displeasure over his decision. They are upset about being “forced to support an organization they know nothing about.”

This kind of thinking drives me nuts. First, my friend never required anyone else to do the same for him , nor did he say that everyone else is morally required to do this just because he is.

Second, he didn’t choose a controversial political organization to support in this endeavor. B:WM is an organization that is providing clean drinking water for people that are dying because they drink bacteria-laden water EVERY DAY. If we saw the water they were drinking, we wouldn’t even suffer a sip. They also minister to the lepers of our day: AIDS patients.

What could he possibly give that would be more meaningful? He’s not making a statement about who to vote for, how to think, or what to buy. He is helping people who are desperate in their need, and putting his family member’s names on the donation.

In other words, he is toppling the Christmas apple cart and giving fruit to the poor.

For many of us, it’s too late for this year, but I wonder what Christmas would look like if we cut our gift-giving budget in half and gave the other half to an organization that is making a difference in the world in the name of Christ.

If you try it, you may upset some people who enjoy the status quo. Won’t that be fun?

christmas

The “Why” of Discipline

I began training last week for another half-marathon (last year’s full marathon was special, but I’m going to keep it sane this year). As I laid out my training schedule, I’m trying to carve 20 minutes off of my best time. This will require a level of discipline that I’ve not achieved in my running experience.

I have experienced both extremes of discipline: the lack of it, and the overkill.

If I lack discipline in a particular area, it is usually because I have lost sight of what originally drove me to set a goal. Or worse yet, I may have never actually set my direction in one way or another, trying something out because someone else talked me into it. This usually results in having no routine, no purposeful planning, and no results.

When I am stuck at that point, my only recourse is to revisit the reasons and motives for my aspirations: Is this my dream? Or someone else’s? Do I own this goal? Should I own it? Is it worth what I’m giving?

If I am experiencing a struggle with laziness, or a lack of discipline, I ask these kinds of questions. I can only be passionate about a goal if I have taken ownership of it.

Once I take my pursuit personally, I may work so hard at it that I fall to the other extreme: turning a good ambition into a life-draining obsession.

Again, a prayerful search through the motives and desires of my heart usually will restore balance: Have I tied up my value and worth as a person somehow with this goal? Am I pouring an unbalanced amount of focus into this goal because I’m avoiding some other issues that need my direct attention?

Setting a goal to run a half-marathon is a good thing, as long as it is a part of an higher calling to care for my body as God’s temple. Doing it only because someone else wants me to, or because I can’t feel good about who I am without it, will leave me lacking the motivation and the meaning for my ambition.

In the same sense, a goal to read through the Bible in a year or practice daily prayer is a fine thing, as long as I don’t elevate that goal over its purpose: to know God. Setting goals of any kind is a good thing, if they are tied God’s purposes for my life.

In marathon training and in the journey with Christ, my pursuit must be an expression of what is inside. Otherwise I run aimlessly, disqualifying myself from the reward of the finish (1 Corinthians 9:26).

Here’s to the pursuit…

Pullman Needs a New Compass

When Krista and I heard that certain Christian groups were boycotting The Golden Compass, it made us want to go see it. But after reading more about it, there is room for caution. If you are planning on going to see the movie, which is based on the first book in a trilogy of novels written by British author Philip Pullman, keep in mind that the studio filtered out his religious views from the movie. The books are much more blatant in their allegorical presentation of his atheism.

I don’t skip movies because the authors, the directors or the actors don’t believe in God. If I made decisions on where to go and what to do based on that criteria, then I would have to lock myself in my home. However, my main reason for skipping The Golden Compass is his disregard for the accomplishments of great authors like Tolkien and C. S. Lewis who have paved the way for him in this genre.

He has commented that the Chronicles of Narnia is “morally loathsome,” and “one of the most ugly and poisonous things I’ve ever read.” He has also referred to The Lord of the Rings as an “infantile work.”

I refuse to give the guy a dime for his movie or novels. I don’t know if Pullman has actually read these two great works, but his comments reveal an ignorance and arrogance beyond what I would expect from an accomplished author who has found his success in part due to the foundation laid by LOTR and Narnia.

Philip Pullman can keep his Compass.

Beautiful Birthday

Happy Birthday, Krista! Today is your golden birthday!

Not that you needed any reminding over the past few weeks as you looked forward to celebrating. In fact, this is one of the things I love most about you: your propensity for celebrating life in all its moments. Whether it be a memory, a moment with me, or visions for the future, you have learned to embrace and celebrate all of it.

Being with you has helped me do the same, even when I don’t see how the future is going to play out. I know I can sit with you over dinner talking and pondering, dreaming and hoping. I always look forward to coming home (especially on homemade pizza night!) and enjoying our talks over dinner and our favorite Napa Valley Cabernet. We are filling the book of our life together with the powerful threads of conversation and communion.

I love you, and know that God is revealing his purposes in us with each passing day. I’m happy that we are sharing this journey. It’s a beautiful walk when I’m with you.

Winged Babies

A painting of God’s angels caught my eye during a movie about fathers and sons reconciling. The painter’s heaven is winged babies, unusually skilled at playing harps and hovering over clouds. I don’t have anything against babies, especially the ones that play instruments. But I hope heaven has more real people more talking, more reconciling, more fallen comrades who are amazed that I am there, too.

The Fall

I drove to the Carolinas to see the drama of changing leaves on the stage of the Smoky Mountains. My mother lives there, accompanied by arthritis. She is changing, too. There are no more fast days. Autumn, decorated by dying, also bears the marks of the Fall of Man.

Dreaded Hope

If it had just fallen on my toe Things might have been better But I dropped it square on my head The idea of Change Now I have a date with a dreaded destiny Now I have a hope for an infinite future Now I have to do something about it (this ridiculous idea)